How Social Media Is Making Kids Grow Up Too Fast

As parents, we all miss the days when our camera rolls were filled with our kids’ toothless grins, chocolate-smeared faces and chubby thighs. Fast forward a few years and our tweens and older kids would consider us “so cringe” if we uploaded these moments to social media. Right?

Social media, much like the invention of the lightbulb, has become synonymous with the modern world and is part of most kids’ daily lives. 

In 2022, 96% of 17-year-olds and 95% of 16-year-olds had a social media account, with some users as young as four or five. Kids spend hours on social media, scrolling through YouTube shorts, Instagram reels and TikTok videos on the daily.

This may seem harmless, offering a brief escape from reality and allowing connection with immediate friends and family. However, being on the hunt for the most likes and shares shapes how our kids perceive the world around them – more negatively than not.

Is social media causing our children to grow up faster than they should? Is it contributing to the staggering increase in adolescent anxiety and depression?

Let’s unpack this topic together.

Girl Interrupted: How Young Girls Are Influenced By Older Female Role Models 

Studies conducted in 2023 showed that teenage girls spend an average of 5.3 hours on social media daily. In comparison, boys spend around 4.4 hours per day. The same report found that kids commonly use social media – Instagram and TikTok – to communicate with their peers and followers more than WhatsApp or WeChat.

Our kids are growing up in a world saturated with social media, constantly pressured to be online and upload the perfect pictures and idealistic videos.

According to a recent Statista report, 50% of British kids frequently use TikTok. In fact, it’s the most popular social media platform among users aged four to 18. This is closely followed by X (formerly Twitter) at 43%, Facebook at 40%, and Instagram at 31%.

What all of these social platforms have in common is that they’re flooded with older female influencers “living their best lives”. These influencers, like celebrity Selena Gomez with 426 million Instagram followers, are fast becoming the new generation of role models for our children… whether we like it or not.

They showcase their lives through meticulously crafted videos and photos, presenting an idealised version of reality. For young girls, this constant exposure can be incredibly influential, shaping their perceptions of beauty, success, and even self-worth.

Morning routines

Imagine a perfectly lit video showcasing a glamorous influencer waking up at sunrise (looking fabulous!), gliding through a flawless skincare routine, followed by a leisurely exercise session and a beautifully prepared breakfast. 

This carefully curated portrayal of a perfect morning routine is often far from reality. They paint an unrealistic picture, filled with filters, professional lighting and the best photographers. Not to mention the entire 30-second clip probably took about four days to film!

However, young girls may internalise this image, feeling pressure to replicate it despite the unrealistic expectations it sets. 

Makeup tutorials

Makeup tutorials are huge on social media, with countless influencers showcasing their latest techniques and product recommendations (e.g. Victoria Beckham and Kim Kardashian).

Learning about makeup application can be fun and creative, but constantly seeing perfectly blended eyeshadow and flawless complexions can distort young girls’ perceptions of natural beauty. 

This bombardment can cause and deepen our own kids’ insecurities, making them feel that not having correctly shaped brows or perfectly pouted lips means something is wrong with them.

They may feel pressured to wear makeup – or opt for facial enhancements like Botox or fillers – to feel confident and accepted, even at a young age when experimentation and playfulness should be the focus.

Skincare routines

Similar to makeup tutorials, skincare routines are another hot trend on the social media front. Influencers often endorse expensive products (and those face enhancements we spoke about earlier). These create the illusion that achieving clear, glowing, wrinkle-free skin requires a complex and costly multi-step routine. 

(Even David Beckham recently shared an Instagram reel about his skincare regime!)

Young girls bombarded with these messages may develop anxieties about their skin and feel that ageing is bad. They might feel insecure about natural imperfections and pressured to purchase products they may not need or afford.

Body dysmorphia

We’ve spoken about morning routines and skincare regimes, but another risk youngsters face is the risk of developing body dysmorphia, also called body dysmorphic disorder (BDD).

BDD is a mental health condition which often develops in adolescence, affecting around 2% of the general population. It’s when someone – typically a young girl – becomes so obsessed with how they look, zoning in on their perceived flaws and imperfections. This often leads to anxiety, depression, eating disorders and paranoia – all because their latest selfie needs to be perfect. 

These imperfections can be anything from not being skinny enough (initiated by pro-eating disorder content), having curly as opposed to straight hair, too many freckles (or the lack of them) or the wrong-shaped nose. 

Sexualisation

Images of sexualised influencers, such as celebrities posing in skimpy lingerie or bikinis, can distort the understanding of what it means to be a woman among younger generations. They may feel that their value or success should be solely based on their physical appearance, sexual appeal, or suggestive behaviours. 

Girls who frequently see sexualised influencers are more likely to compare their own bodies to these unrealistic images, resulting in feelings of inadequacy and lower self-esteem

The Shift: Childhood Play To Adult Behaviours And Routines

The shift from traditional childhood play to adopting adult behaviours is a concerning trend. 

Constant exposure to a world of perfectly posed pictures and staged videos can lead to a shift in priorities.

• Children who were once content with building sandcastles are now worried about getting the most likes on their social media content or recording the latest TikTok challenge. This can cause our kids to neglect schoolwork or social interactions with real-life friends which is a major red flag.
• Games of hide-and-seek are replaced by staged selfies and imaginative play takes a backseat to mimic the “cool” adult routines they see online. This premature adultification leads to the loss of childhood innocence, replacing it with the pressures of adult responsibilities at an early age.

Studies show anxiety, depression and body dysmorphia pose significant risks as kids compare their appearance to what is seen on the internet. Influencers can seriously blur the lines between childhood and adulthood behaviours. Children frequently compare themselves to these rich, famous, and seemingly fabulous lifestyles online.

Unfortunately, these adult behaviours don’t stop at makeup applications. They have a darker side too, transcending to smoking, drinking, nudity, violence or other adult activities just to bump up their online street cred.

The pressure to perform and present a flawless online persona robs our kids of the joy of simply being kids – and gives them extreme anxiety if they don’t.

We, as parents, need to monitor what our kids consume and post online, whether it’s via Facebook, YouTube, TikTok or other online platforms. 

Parent Tip: Encouraging Age-Appropriate Activities

Here are six tips to encourage age-appropriate activities:

1. Set clear boundaries: Establish age-appropriate guidelines for social media use. Consider factors like maturity level and the specific platform before allowing your child to create an account. 
2. Install parental controls: Consider using software like Circle or Bark to monitor your kids’ online activities in full incognito mode, from controversial video games to personal in-app chats. These platforms flag any “funny business”, like inappropriate or explicit content, and predatory behaviour. It then sends a notification straight to your phone.
3. Open communication: Talk to your children openly about what they see online. Explain the dangers of AI-generated content, harmful challenge trends, and unrealistic lifestyles. 
4. Lead by example: Be a positive role model. Be mindful of what you post online and your reaction to likes and shares. Put your phone down during family time to show your children that there’s a whole world to experience beyond the screen. 
5. Encourage unplugged play: Schedule screen-free time and encourage outdoor activities with family and friends. These activities include board games, arts and crafts, bike rides, sports, or trips to the beach. 
6. Boost their self-esteem: Celebrate your children’s individuality, whether they’re chosen for a sports team or show kindness to their peers. Avoid comparing them to others and allow them to develop and grow at their own pace.

By being mindful of social media’s influence and encouraging real-world connections, we can help our children navigate this digital age. 

Real-life Examples: Children Mimicking Adult Behaviours Due To Social Media

There are many trends kids have fallen victim to in recent years, thanks to social media. 

While some – like Beyoncé’s “Texas Hold ‘Em” dance challenge – were fun, others were dangerously viral.

Take the “Tide Pod Challenge” that flooded TikTok feeds back in 2018, for example. Videos of teens eating laundry detergent pods sparked a dangerous trend. Facebook and YouTube both removed such posts but they continued to spread rapidly online, causing at least 10 deaths in the USA.

Other horrific challenges include:

• The Skull Breaking Challenge – TikTok 
• The Choking Challenge – YouTube
• The Benadryl Challenge – TikTok
• The One Chip Challenge

These online trends spread quicker than a forest fire in a drought, especially among teens seeking approval from their peers. Couple this with the fear of being ridiculed if they don’t partake and you have a recipe for disaster.

Teens lack the maturity to effectively know right from wrong because their brains are still developing. It is speculated that the prefrontal cortex (the part of the brain that controls rational thinking) is only fully developed around the mid-20 mark, which could explain this influx of risky behaviour.  

As parents, we must educate and guide our children on the difference (and dangers) between being “cool” and acting foolish. After all, these challenges can be fatal if we don’t have a grip on what our kids are doing.

Expert Insights: The Psychological Impact Of Premature Adultification

A National Library of Medicine study concluded that social media and premature adultification directly impact children’s development and well-being. 

Excessive usage can cause sleep problems, unhealthy relationships with food, addictive behaviours, body image misperceptions and mental health issues, such as anxiety, depression and suicidal ideation.  

The study of 68 participants revealed:

• 27.9% experienced depression.
• 22.1% had diet issues.
• 22.1% faced cyberbullying.
• 20.6% had psychological problems.
• 14.7% dealt with addiction.
• 14.7% had anxiety.
• 13.2% faced sex-related issues.
• 8.8% had body image problems.

Additionally, the study highlighted adolescents suffering from “Facebook depression” – a term linking the relationship between depression and social networking activity. Those with this condition may be at an increased risk of social isolation and vulnerability to drugs or behavioural problems.

And if that isn’t enough, the exposure to mature content and unrealistic beauty standards can lead to:

• Body image issues: Constantly comparing themselves to heavily edited photos can lead to a distorted sense of self-worth and dissatisfaction with their own bodies. This can contribute to the development of eating disorders, BDD, and low self-esteem.
• Anxiety and depression: The pressure to maintain a perfect online persona and the fear of missing out (a.k.a. FOMO) can be a significant source of anxiety for youngsters. The curated happiness they see online can make their own lives seem “boring” or “bad”, leading to feelings of depression.
• Cyberbullying: Social media platforms can become breeding grounds for cyberbullying. These online trolls prowl the digital domains in search of their next victim (i.e. our kids). The harassment, rumours, and insults can be severely stressful and traumatic.

As you can see, many, MANY potential issues lurk beneath the glitz and glam of social media platforms. 

Experts say parents must monitor their children’s social media use, encourage off-screen activities and foster healthy social connections outside these digital realms.

The Conversation Continues

We want to hear from you.

Do you think social media makes our kids grow up faster than they should? What strategies do you implement to manage your kids’ screen time and social media use?

Share your tips in the comments section below.

We’d love to hear what you think…